Potts Is A Putz

The scattered remnants of Dundee's expedition stumbled through the underbrush of western Mexico. It had been months since they'd seen town, or any kind of point. Someone suggested that Groggy Dundee was just lazy and wouldn't tell them what the goals of the campaign were by this point, but the Major vehemently denied this. It had something to do with Dundee's college education . . .

Captain Tim Tyreen returned from his reconnassiance at Begonia, wiping the sweat from his brow. He saluted Dundee and reported.

"What happened?"

"It was like watching a bird die. . ." Tyreen began, struggling to catch his breath. The two then heard galloping, and Jed Potts came riding up, pursued by eight French soldiers on horseback.

"DAMN IT, POTTS!" Dundee shouted. "Can't you cover your track, you stupid bastard!?"

Shots began to ring out throughout the camp. The soldiers, eager for action, scrambled for their weapons and began firing wildly. In the melee, none of the French soldiers were hit, but Potts' and Tyreen's horses were riddled with bullets. The French soldiers turned back and rode off.

Dundee holstered his pistol and turned back to Tyreen. "Now, you were saying. . ."

Suddenly there was the shriek of an incoming artillery shell.

"SHIT!" Dundee screamed, jumping from his horse. The shell smashed into the ground nearby, dismembering his horse. Dundee grabbed a pair of binoculars from Joe Starbuck and saw - DAMN IT! - three French tanks, plus armored personnel carriers and Jeeps coming up.

Dundee stood up and turned to give orders, but she saw Sergeants Harriman and Kimmel driving their tank towards the French column, with Tom manning the gun. Dundee watched as they drove straight into a tree, then shook his head in disgust.

"Sergeant Cullen!" Dundee shouted.

"Sir?"

"Organize the troop - NOW!" Dundee shouted as machine gun fire began to rake the camp.

Tom returned fire with the machine gun, but was hit several times by French fire and fell to the ground. Bill ran towards the French column with a grenade launcher, managing to destroy the lead tank before he too was cut down. Dundee saw Alex Starbuck get struck in the arm, and realized that his column was in a trap.

"FALL BACK! FALL BACK!" Dundee shouted as bullets whizzed around them.

He then turned and saw Sergeant Harriman and Kimmel rushing towards the French column with their machine gun. Do those morons have a death wish?? he asked himself, watching them disappear into the fog of battle.

Sergeant Cullen rushed up to Dundee and saluted.

"Sir?"

"What is it, Sergeant?"

"All of our armored transports have been destroyed."

"By the French?"

"No, sir, by Sergeant Harriman."

Dundee scowled angrily, then turned to his men.

"Well, what in the hell are staring at me for??" he shouted. "Use your goddamned legs - that's what they're for!" He then rushed over to the smoking tank and grabbed Tom, dragging his sorry ass to a pack mule and shoving him on top of him.

Some of Dundee's men - namely Aimee and the Gorch Brothers - wanted to stand and fight, but most of them obeyed his orders to a "T". It's going to be a loooooooooong spring, Dundee thought to himself, watching the French column approach. Fucking Frogs. . .