The Characters - The Loyalists

The members of the expedition, great in number though not necessarily in quality, were hopelessly overmatched by Charriba's 250 men.

Groggy Dundee - the expedition's leader - organized a hunting party from two major subgroups - his associates, and the Internet. His associates were bad enough, but his Internet recruits were a group of anonymous nutjobs who could be child molesters for all he knew. Fortunately, they were the guys he would be able to depend on.

The expeditions' members will verily be divided into four groups: the Loyalists, the Scouts, miscellaneous tag-alongs, and the Internet folks (along with the importance of their characters). We will deal with the Loyalists first.

Character importance scale:

• Major Character - A
• Major Supporting Character - B
• Minor Supporting Character - C
• Bit Part/Expendable Sandbag - D

The Loyalist Characters, Or Hopeless Suck-ups

• Groggy Dundee - Groggy Dundee was in the doghouse for slamming his fist against a textbook in AP US History class, causing a loud "boom" and disrupting classes. Groggy Dundee thought that the perfect way to deflect notice from this would be to invade Mexico - a reasonable enough assumation. - A
• Joe Starbuck - Your generally reliable subordinate to Groggy Dundee, Joe sadly knows little about the military arts, but he can speak Spanish very well. - A
• Sergeant Cullen - Dundee's tough-as-nails, take-no-shit enforcer. - B
• Sergeant Harriman - Dundee's soft-as-a-plush-toy, take-nothing-seriously subordinate who likes to run things over in her car. - B
• Sergeant Kimmel - Pretty much the same as Harriman, only with a helicopter. - C
• Grenouille - The French-like nickname given to Dundee's young ordinance officer, who has been placed in charge of arming and supplying the expedition. Is he up to the task? You decide. - B
• Plasmotic Snake - This bizarrely-named individual is a would-be one-man army. He carries an assault weapon and a submachine gun on his person at all time. He is silent, lanky, self-absorbed, and secretly wants to kill a few of his colleagues. - B
• Alex K. Starbuck - Joe's brother, with pretty much the same principles applying. - C
• Aimee - A friend of Joe and Groggy's who has come back from her pilgrimage to Florida to join the expedition. - C